bleeding mascara

HEY.

2006-03-27T15:24:00.000+08:00

I'VE MOVED!!!!! AGAIN!!!!!
CLICK HERE

i won't be using this blog anymore. ta.

blah.

2006-03-05T22:39:00.000+08:00

i'm sick of blogger.
i'm sick of everything.

bye ah.

the ghost of you

2006-02-28T00:59:00.000+08:00

nowadays i seem to put song titles as my post titles.
especially at my lj.
why eh? i dono. k nvm.

i'm tired. work was a constant just now.
crowd and customers coming in every 5 minutes.
it's the convention time again,
so my store will be extra busy.
with the IT exhibition coming up,
man, i'll be damn tired.

just now i was conquering the bar.
coolness ah. doing solo at the bar.
like, crazy man. i'm surprised i kept my calm.
put me there to do solo bar 4 mths ago,
i would have pee and shit in my pants.

i need my slp.

I Have Ten Friends And a Crowbar That Says You Ain't.

2006-02-24T00:04:00.000+08:00

work was ok.
everything is ok.
it's good to be the one of the senior ones in store.
i can bully ppl.
lol.
"go bussing pls! help me check condiment bar! can u help me wipe the glass door?"
yeah.

anyway, our anniversary date is on 29th of april 2005.
this year, there's no 29 in feb.
so does it still count as 1 year?
or 364 days?
lol. lame right lame.

ok. bored.
bye.

the angel from my nightmare.

2006-02-21T23:25:00.001+08:00

had a dream.
that my neighbour was stabbed by her husband coz she nagged too much.
she does!

she can nag at him and all he will do is keep quiet and sit one corner
while she go around our corridor telling us how useless her husband is.
we don't care and we dowan to know ok?

anyway, about the dream.
supposedly i saw myself walking along my corridor to the lift,
(the neighbour's house is located near the lift, at the end of my corridor)
when i saw a pool of blood outside my neighbour's door.

on further inspection, i saw my neighbour lying face up,
eyes wide open and with a knife pierced through her chest.
and her husband was crying with his hands filled with blood.

i couldn't scream at all and i stood rooted to the ground.
and then the husband approached me.
and.....

then i woke up.

i know. wrong scene to wake up.
wondering whether he'd stab me as well, or cry for help.
hmmm..

behind these hazel eyes.

2006-02-19T22:39:00.000+08:00

5 more weeks to my boy's P.O.P.
or as he and the kids' boys always say, "P.O.P ohhhhh!"
heh. i miss him already.
and i miss the kids also.
gang, bile mau lepak lagik?"

anyway, man u lost.
after 85 yrs of defeating pool in an fa cup draw,
we lost.
scored by crouch, no less,
the person they called a flop.
i bet he would be saying, "who's the flop now ah?"
poor smith. get well soon boy.

will be having an interview tmr.
wish me luck man.
i need it.

thanks to everyone who say their condolences about my hp.
lol.
i'm ok now.
really i am. not kidding!

k bye?

ok.i'm cool.

2006-02-16T21:25:00.000+08:00

i've decided.
maybe there's a blessing in losing the phone.
maybe i'll get an even better phone.
like N70 or N90?
hah. fat hope.
but i'm just trying to console myself.
isn't that what sad and depressed ppl always do?
console themselves silly even though it doesn't work?

yeah..i guess i'm ok.
no use thinking about it
and making my life stop in a standstill over a phone.
right.

moving on.
meeting the boy tmr.
that, i can't wait.
5 days seems to be getting longer and longer.

the 1st 2 mths was bearable.
it was as though friday came very soon.
but now, since he had been extended for another 3 more mths,
it is hell.
glad it's only 2 mths left.

i'm so contradicting myself. but whatever k.
my pasal.

working tmr.
yeay.
miss my twinny, linda.

i just wanna cry.

2006-02-15T19:29:00.000+08:00

dear boyfriend a.k.a my fireman,

i seriously don't blame u for my lost phone. i blame the fact that u have a thief for a friend and u still dowan to blame anybody. why are u so sweet. if i were u, i would scream my head off. but i'm not. i'm lucky to have u.. haiz..

but still!! i can't stop crying!!! my photos!! my everything!! argh.

sincerely,
me.

argh.argh.argh.

2006-02-15T01:37:00.000+08:00

i am sick today. vomitted twice.
out came everything. cool.
but still i went to work.
not one to give up. managed to work, although slowly.
and angrily.
glad someone will take over my shift tmr
coz i am tired!

made a partner recalled calling a drink EIGHT times!
i was like, "recall."
she called back, i said, "recall."
again, she called back, i said, "recall."
she was calling the drink wrongly eight times.
yeah, the new partner.
on the 8th try, she gave up.

after 4 customers had gone, i told her, "i still want u to recall that drink."
my manager and full time partner were telling me, "yes ah ayu! good job."
she has to learn what. i was taught that way.
now it's payback time. lol.

and 6 of my partners are busy with o level thingy.
finding school and all that shit.
2 of them are still in the "i dono where to go" stage.
and the mere mention of ite make them wince.
pls, grow up, ite is no longer about drop-outs, rejects
or those who can't pass their bloody o.
sure, alot of gangsters or budak2 jahat are in there,
but guess what? when ite students graduate,
employers and companies are knocking on their doors
for their skills. coz we learn things hands-on.

and when my ite friends went to poly to further their studies,
my poly friends were the one lagging behind
and had to ask my ite friends for help.

eat that suckas.

hate to ruin ur reputation with the "i went to ite and i'm ashamed" label?
then don't go. go la salle or nafa.
only ite has ur course or u only qualify for that course in ite?
then too bad.

argh. it's up to the individual to be influenced by others k.
just do ur own shit and study damn fucking hard
and u'll do as well as poly or jc graduates.

luckily i am not that close to the 2 partners
or i'll ask them to suck my balls.

and luckily i have none.

thank u. thank u very nice.

2006-02-12T22:33:00.000+08:00

i would like to take this opportunity to thank:---

1)middlebrough for thrashing chelsea 3-0. not a big thrashing but it is. so shut up jose mourinho. but u're still charming.

2)those who welcome me back on to the cyber world.

3)my family for always standing by me.

4)my friends for being my friends.

5)my fireman for taking good care of me, for making sure i always get to eat even though u are in camp and u can't be there physically.

heh. reading all this back makes me think that i'm on the verge on dying. lol.

p.s: thank to photos.yahoo.com for deleting my 500++ photos!! do u know how sad and angry i feel? it's undescribable!! 20 albums, 500++ photos, gone!!! argh!! i wanna cry..

ramblings.

2006-02-11T01:27:00.000+08:00

i need a job.

i need time to re-do everything in the cyber world.

i need to upload alot of pics.

i need to gain alot of weight. 39kg isn't nice.

i need to be a better person.

i need to be less spendthrift.

i need money.

i need you.

pronto.

now i realise...

2006-02-09T23:46:00.000+08:00

watching the grammys now.
now i realise john legend is cute.
heh.

anyway, the outside seating of my store has changed.
the chairs are much more comfy.
but u know what?
bussing is a killer.
i am small, for the love of mankind.
the tables and chairs are arranged so close to each other
that i had a hard time manouvering my tub full of plates/cups/trash
from one end to the other.

and customers, i am not ur dog.
we are not ur fucking dogs.
we are human beings just like u and me.
sure we may not be working in an office
or wearing formal office wear like u.
but we are still humans.

if there's no one making the bloody drinks for u,
not just at starbucks, any other cafes too,
u guys will be sleeping on ur desks.

so pls, don't throw the money on the counter
as though we owe u money.
or we are begging u for money.
if u dowan to give it to our hands,
kindly put it down on the counter and slide it towards us.

and no fucking way am i gonna be polite to u no matter what.

LOL!

2006-02-08T23:27:00.000+08:00

some news are meant to surprise u.
some news are meant to shock u.
some news are meant to tickle u silly.
some news are meant to make u laugh.
some news are meant to make u cry.
some news are meant to left u speechless.

BUT!

THAT FUCKING PIECE OF NEWS IS THE TOPS MAN!!!!!
IT IS FUCKING EVERYTHING!!!!!
LOL!!!!!

haiz.
so shd i laugh or cry now?

*speechless*

i.. am.. so.. sad..

2006-02-07T12:25:00.000+08:00

i work like a dog and all i got was that amt?
argh.

can i cry now?

i am so back.

2006-02-05T22:20:00.000+08:00

hi ppl.
missed me?

i miss myself.

i miss my rantings.

i miss my blabberings.

i miss everything in the cyber world.

and i miss you guys!!!

lol. i'm still the lame bitch that i was.

life's been good.
work's been great.
friends have been fantastic.
family have been awesome.
boyf has been kick-ass.

will be changing my skin soon, i promise.
just bear with me k.
and if i got the same skin as yours, sorry ya.

love y'all.

hi.

2005-09-01T20:13:00.000+08:00

remember me?
i'm not back yet.
my com's still dead.
cheebye.
wait till september k.
i love my job.

i don't look underage. THREE MORE DAYS!

2005-06-21T00:26:00.000+08:00

yesternight, dad was admitted to Changi Hospital for severe asthma attack.
he has been discharged since.
but just now, bro has just been operated on.
there were some growth in his somewhere.
2 family members of mine were admitted to Changi Hospital in a few hours'
apart from each other.
remind me to buy 4D.

a customer came and pat my shoulder,
"OMG!!!!! how old are you?"
me, promoting my birthday, ahem,
"oh, 20 on this coming friday."
"OOOOOMMMGGG!!! YOU ARE SOOO SMALLL!!!!"

erm thanks?

a customer asked my manager if i'm legal enough to work.

wow. that's insulting.

and time passed so fast when i'm doing the cash register.
my 1st time and i fumbled a couple of times.
now i'm addicted to it.

my workplace has a lot of conflicts and politics going on.
but i'm blending with everyone.
well, except for that CB.
i love my store.

oh. i think khai misses me.
lol.
he asked me if i'm working today.
i said yes, i am.
then he asked me what time and i replied 1pm.
i asked him for his time and he said 5.30pm.
he told me to work at nights now.
coz it's been a long time since he work with me.
lol.
but i think he wanted me to work with him
so i can ask wani to come down.
*toot* friend.
see u later dude.
and i'm just kidding about u missing me,
although i am missing the kids.

the cast of Initial D will arrive in Singapore at 12.30pm
at Changi Airport.
and they will have a red carpet session at 7.30pm.
but fuck.
i'm working.

THREE. 3. TIGA. 3.

off to work. in 9 hours time.

2005-06-19T03:11:00.000+08:00

i'm hungry, alone and tired.
my body's aching from head to toe.
will be working at 1pm later.
hope great ppl will be working.
i hate to work with her.
and the cuzzens and the siblings will probably be coming down
later to see me work.
it will be fun. but damn. i have to be on my proper behaviour.
oh, u know what i mean.

anyway, i'm sure u guys read about the entry
written by this person about malay/muslim.
i don't know what is the person's problem,
but i know he has one.
click here if u guys don't know what i'm talking about.

i seriously can't wait for kl.
pay on the 7th, the trip on the 8th.
KL MENJERIT AH!

ok bye.

bleeding mascara

2005-06-18T03:03:00.000+08:00

if only i could turn back time.
for once i've regrets about my pasts.
i've never been the sort to regrets about my or people's pasts.
but for now i do...
i seriously need to stop thinking about it.

oh, come on, u partner of mine at work.
i don't give a fuck if u hate me.
just coz u're a senior, do u think i shd respect u if u show disrespect to me?
wake up to reality. we're not in secondary school.
like emily said, we are newbies what. must understand ah siak.
i get along with everyone.
except u, when we don't even talk to each other that much.
bloody nimkampoot.

i look at the world differently.

2005-06-17T00:10:00.000+08:00

when u have neighbours who love to mind YOUR business to their own household
and marriage shits, you know you don't need bodyguards and spies and minders.

when u have friends who are around to tell you when there's a sale somewhere,
you know you don't need flyers, advertisements and brochures.

when u have someone who can talk about everything and anything with you under the sun,
you know you don't need anymore lonely days and nights.

goodbye.

p.s: meeting just now was great but it was sad too. i'll sorely miss u morgan.
and i'll be working today. dang.

i'm just sad.

2005-06-16T01:12:00.000+08:00

maybe i'm the bad luck to start work at Suntec?
coz it seems that everyone is leaving or being fired.
am i the jinx in that place?
i hope not. :(

i'm not in the mood to update about anything.
i'll miss morgan.
he really is a fun manager.
fuck.

and i cried watching eye for a guy.
howard is soooo goofy.
i love goofy guys.

ok fuck.

fuck.

2005-06-15T00:33:00.000+08:00

i miss the kids.
can't wait for kl.

i've passed my NITEC.
thanks alot to alif for doing most of our projects.
what do i care about my GPA.
as long as i bloody get the cert.

life sucks when ppl leave u the minute trouble brew.
i wish they would linger around longer to hug me.
coz i badly need them.

//edited.
ok. i'm ok.
anyway, i'll be having my URGENT store meeting this thursday at 1pm at Starbucks HQ.
the place where i had my training.
i wonder why eh.
hmmm...

and my birthday is coming.
weeeeee..i'm 20 soon!!
so big yet still so childish..
yeay! just what i like!

pop the corn.

2005-06-13T01:28:00.000+08:00

will be working on friday and sunday this work.
tell me. how dead can my schedule get?
sorry to leave u guys hanging on sunday.
emergency calls.

i'm just bored.
i really am.

can anybody tell me why some ppl have all the luck in the world?

oh! farid has changed his 2-seater convertible to a 5-seater one.
so... now... it means that, i can follow him and wani out
whenever possible.
hhhahaa.. tak tahu malu peh org.
what? but he let me go what!

and here i am eating popcorn at 1.45 in the morning.
cheerios.

memoirs of a geisha

2005-06-10T00:56:00.000+08:00

i read this book of the same title thrice
and i still haven't get bored of it.
and i know i won't get bored of it.
it's such a wonderful piece of work.
you readers should read it.
same goes for Da Vinci's Code by Dan Brown.
READ THEM!

the reason i'm talking about books was because,
i saw these 3 customers of mine holding these 2 books.
i felt like making friends with them just now
just so we could open a book club
and read books till we die.
god i'm such a nerd and a bookworm.
a cool one at that. wowness.

went to the pasar malam at sengkang after work
and bought myself a burger ramly.
reached home, i ate it in 3 minutes flat.
that's fast for my rate.
i was too hungry to even fully chew the burger
and swallow it slowly.
you should see the state i was in.
what a glutton.

talking about work,
i felt like being in school all over again,
with my Starbucks training book being folded
because my answers were wrong.
my District Manager personally checked my book
and he wrote me a Stick-It note,
telling me to rewrite my answers and all that shit.
haiz... i'll persevere for the sake of that $210.

i can't wait to go kl!!!!!
skali terserempak with them how?
cool kan!

i wish my period would just come.
coz i want my pms to be over.
i'm getting depressed, frustrated, annoyed, irritated, angry
over the slightest thing.
it sucks. BIG TIME.

and.....
jeng jeng jeng.
i have a new "best friend" at work.
LOL!
it's a joke shared among me, patipong n nurul.
jangan kacau sis gua k.

i love friendster.
i just found my long lost secondary school mate.
yey!

if you guys managed to read till this end,
kudos to you.
coz these are all crappy ramblings.
BYE!

ok. done.

2005-06-08T23:54:00.000+08:00

i'm so glad for the outcome.
i managed to get back on track.
the crying is all worth it.
trust me.

and so, i changed my layout.
AGAIN!
and i love this layout coz u know why?
my fave chinese boys are all here.
Jay Chou, Edison Chen, Jordan Chan.
heh.

working tmr from 12noon to 7.30pm.
changed with khairin from friday to thursday.
i didn't get my pay.
expected, coz i haven't complete my Starbucks book.
but it's ok.
when i go kl next month, i'll be getting my pay the day before.
and i'll go nuts shopping.

oh. i get to go kl.
on the 8th of july.
yeay!!!
unless my dad decided to get cranky and changes his mind.

and captain's cook has wonderful dessert.
heavenly.

NOTICE!

2005-06-06T04:30:00.000+08:00

THIS BLOG IS UNDER SERIOUS CONSTRUCTION!
Will repair it when i'm free eh.....

it's my shit.

2005-06-06T02:30:00.000+08:00

happy 20th birthday tweety-san.
take care of yourself ok.
don't scratch your chicken pox.
love ya.

and eighteen more days to mine!
i can't wait bloody hell.

i think i am too slow making drinks
when it comes to making more than 5 drinks.
i hate being rushed.
i'm like that.
and i'm working at an environment where at a certain time,
lots and lots of ppl will come in to buy something.

i get so paranoid and uptight with my ownself,
thinking if the rest of the partners are thinking i'm slow,
i'm clumsy, i'm blur, i'm so belo, i'm so slenge.
i'm getting on my own nerves.

my sis said it's been almost a month since i've started working,
and i've shd be a pro by now.
YOUR BLOODY HEAD, ok?
i'm putting pressure on my own self.
god pls help me!

for 2 days in a row, i've been extended by 2 hours on the job.
it's great really when i work with fun ppl.
time passes by so fast
and i'll be having fun as well as working at the same time.

i didn't get to go to naz's farewell party.
i'll miss having him as my manager.
i know i've said it countless of times,
but it's true, i'll miss having him as my manager.
he really cares.
but oh well, i'll see u around in sengkang alright.

which is really funny coz for the 7 years i've live in sengkang,
i've never once seen u around sengkang
except when we came over to ur house for hari raya.
so old skool.

so kl trip has been postpone to 8 july.
oh good.
i can save my money till then.
and i'll be getting my pay as well.
yeahhhhhhhhhhh.. :D

basically, my blog and tagboard have suddenly gone... dead.

bless me and my life.

2005-06-03T01:16:00.000+08:00

work was fun today.
of coz, my favourite people were working.
if only naz isn't leaving suntec.
damn. i'll miss having him as my manager.
i think i'll go on a strike at the HQ.

anyway, today i've worked from 3pm to 11.15pm.
luckily alif, khus and some of their friends came down.
so i was abit smangat to perform
and not make a fool of myself.
heh.

so can i or can i not?
damnit ah.
make me pissed off ah.

sometimes i don't understand myself.

i went crazy.

2005-06-02T00:45:00.000+08:00

had around 20 orders for frappucino drinks.
in one go.
and being a newbie, i went ballistic.
crazy humans. can't u like, order something else instead all fraps?
luckily my manager and partner were there to assist me.
i'd cry if i were to do it on my own.

working 3pm-11pm tmr.
haiz.
crazy sia.
but nvm, for the love of my 1st ever pay, i'll persevere.

and because u wanted to take over man united so much,
u ended up with debts that u can't clear.
so now u have to resort to selling MY rio ferdinand, ruud van nistelrooy and john o'shea.
fuck u glazer.

and i still haven't get my answers yet.

k bye. wanna change layout.

i am so stressed.

2005-05-31T21:35:00.000+08:00

the thought of working tmr is stressing me out.
don't get me wrong, i love working.
but knowing that i have to make the drinks at the bar
is stressing me out.
i haven't memorise the recipes for the drinks at the bar damnit.
how how.
you know, this is much more worst than making frap drinks.
frap drinks are so easy. bar drinks are a little complicated.
i even had dreams about starbucks, making bar drinks.
how weird is that?
so the kemarok.

the kids are going kl.
i want to go too
but dad and mum haven't give me a definite answer yet.
well, dad has said no.
but i'm trying my luck for the 3rd time.
mum is helping me to saiko dad.
pls dad, i really wanna go.
so badly, i can cry.
if i can go, i'm willing to trade my freedom for the rest of the year.
pretty pls?

i was at the end of doing this bulletin at friendster,
when suddenly, my com went, "........."
i was about to press the submit button siakkk.
you wouldn't wanna know how pissed off i was.

and i got a Powerpuff Girls notebook.
i have alot to write down.

ok. it's getting lame
and i'm getting hungry.

tmr will be working at 10am - 5.30pm.
right. hope i'll get through it.

so i told you with a smile.

2005-05-31T00:12:00.000+08:00

i think the mcfly song, "it's all about you"
is a little cliched
but yet it is so sweet.
short and sweet.
heh. i'm a sucker for anything sweet.

it's amazing how fast june arrived.
about 25 more days to my birthday.
20 years old.
no no.. ain't hinting for anything ok.
i just can't believe i've lived this long.
alhamdullilah.

seriously. my blog is getting deader and deader.
i just have a writer's block at the moment.
i mean, it's not that my blog is any fun to read
but i just don't have any idea what to blog nowadays.
any help?

ok. this com seriously sucks big time.

and since Pool won the European Cup,
my bro is becoming more and more obsessed with that team.
but it's good though.
he just told that Pool is buying John O'Shea of Man Utd.
WTF? got a huge feeling Man Utd is going down under this Glazer fucker.
haiz.

and pls pray for me that i can go.
i badly wanna go.
how bad? i'm willing to trade the rest of the year's freedom for this.
serious.

and i think my layout is so damn nonsense but cute.
just like moi. :D

bye lah.

sometimes

2005-05-30T00:46:00.000+08:00

i wished i was a boy instead.
seriously. sometimes i wished i have a dick.

and i realised that the more ppl give in to me,
the more i respect and adore them.
when they don't,
the more i rebel.

will be working on wed, thurs, sat, sun.
i'm getting so complacent not working from last friday till tuesday.
heh.
i miss it some how though.

ok bored.
and madagascar is one hell of a short cartoon.
i love chris rock.

closing.

2005-05-27T03:42:00.000+08:00

tiring sia.
i reached home at 3.
suntec closing time long giler babi.
ok. tired already.
wah sibei rhyme sia.

pool won.
i watched the bloody match from the kick-off till
the time Stevie G lifted up the European Cup.
i was laughing my heads off when AC Milan scored their 3rd goal.
but in my heart, i so badly wanted pool to come back
which seem impossible.

2nd half, i think AC Milan had drunk their celebratory champagne in the dressing room.
by then, pool had scored their 1st goal, 2nd and 3rd.
*WHAM*
my eyes were wide awake.
i was jumping like mad.
my sis was looking at me and she said,
"wtf since when u had become a pool fan?"
heh.
bro barged into the room and started jumping,
"heart attack, heart attack!"
mad.
i was caught by his enthusiasm.
and it was 4+ in the morning, not evening ok.

sis said, "confirm the match was fixed."
i refused to believe that fact.
the day it is been confirmed, i'll truly lose my faith in soccer.
but yes, congrats pool.
i felt proud, surprisingly.
and EPL team.
an inconsistent one at that, won the Champions League.
Kudos.

*yawn*

this is what i like.

2005-05-25T23:59:00.000+08:00

as they say, with great company, you'll feel and have fun.
how true.
work yesterday, 25/5/05, was FUN with a capital F.
make that FUN with all the letters in capitals.
FUN. F-U-N.
i've never thought i would not want the day to end.
it was just awhile ago i had punched in my card to start the day
and suddenly, my manager, naz asked me to punch out.

i mean, there were khaiRUN [i have to resort typing out his full name now that his bro is working there as well.],
my manager and long time friend, naz,
the sweet girlfriends whom i adore so much, nurul and afiqah.
the 4 of them were making me laughed and have fun
but at the same time, learning and training was bearable
and enjoyable under them.
no pressure to perform, but the eagerness to learn must be there.

and my goodness, don't get me started on them 4 gossipping.
it was great fun.
i have additional bitching partners to bitch with.
cool shits.

and see what khai n naz did while i was busy making bar drinks?
they were busy taking pictures of themselves
and setting their pics as my wallpaper.
HAHA. kentot.
pics at the end of the entry.

khai is a good learning coach.
he totally patient, understanding.
i'm not saying this just because he's my friend.
[he's reading this btw, so must praise mah! kidding ah!]
but seriously, the way he teaches me is very straightforward and clear cut.
to anyone who taught khai on how to teach me,
please, get a life.
he's doing a great job.

so i'll be doing closing today from 6pm to 1.30am.
khai won't be there
but the other 3 crazy heads will be.
so i hope it will be as fun as yesterday.
come on down if you guys wanna see me work ok.
hahaha..

for once, i'm hoping pool to win.
coz i'm an english premier league fan.
not Serie A. or Spanish League. or whatever league fan.
and also, for the fact that farid flew almost everyone he knew off to Istanbul.
i don't want him to waste his money on ALL the air tickets he spent on.
hahahaa..

bought myself a Yoda figurine.
well actually, not his figurine,
just his face keychain.
1.90 at metro.
hahahaha.. i'm so mad about the green guy.

how many people can stand up and say they know of a guy friend,
be it a boyfriend or just a best friend,
that is willing to travel anywhere that you want to go to,
ANYWHERE AT ALL, even a long walk to nowhere, even if you have been talking nonsense,
even though he's tired, lazy, can't be bothered, pennyless,
slack, sleepy, bored, moody, short tempered [insert more negative adjectives here.]?

i know i'll stand up.

oh yes. hanif,
happy 20th birthday.

My mad manager-cum-near-my-block-neighbour, naz, and my mad friend-cum-partner-at-work, khaiRUN.

typical khai's antics.

grrr...

2005-05-24T01:28:00.000+08:00

4am, Monday Morning.

"i'm going to Istanbul.. so there is no need for you guys to call or msg me, or else your bill will be so high. take care.." -farid

"wow.. for what you go there? NS? Holiday?" -me

"Champions League Final.. Gotta go now. Take care." -farid

"WWWWWOOOOOOWWWW.. kiss Stevie G for me." -me

some people just have all the luck in the world.
FYI, farid is filthy rich. VERY VERY filthy rich.
at 20, he has his own 2 storey semi detached house,
a Z4 BMW Convertible, master cards, visa and what nots.
and he's a mad liverpool fan.
so u can't blame him for getting a little enthusiatic,
especially when liverpool is in the final.
FINAL, mind you.

i'm very content with my life.
like my friends said, just give ayu clorets and she's happy. heh.
alhamdullilah.
but if only i get to go Istanbul now and watch the Champions League Final.
grrrr...

down and out.

2005-05-23T19:55:00.000+08:00

went to the doc just now.
my temperature was 38.90 degrees celsius.
i have mc for tmr.
and doc gave me bloody big tablets.
no trouble swallowing them
but the after-taste lingered around longer than it should.
doc said i have swollen tonsils.
what the heck is that.
but i know that it is painful when doc pressed it.

i'm such a weakling.
i'm ashamed of myself.
but my sister in law said, i am probably not used to working life.
hence the fever.
everything is cold to the touch.
i'm perspiring but i'm feeling cold.
and my head feels heavy.
feel like dying.
don't know how dying feels like but i can just imagine
that it is like this.
tuhan saje yg tahu ape aku rase.

so i've been sick twice in a month.
mom said savings from the metal box is not just for me,
it's for the whole family
but it seems i'm the one who used it alot.
hahaha.. she was being sarcastic but she was smiling when she said that.
i know she was just kidding.
love u mom.

so now, i've just measured my temperature again.
it's getting higher, not lower.
39.69 degrees celsius.
the more i lie in bed, the worst i feel.
i should walk about, fight the bloody fever.

i'm alone right now at home.
so scared i might faint alone.
mom, lil butterfly and sis in law, bro just went out.
can't wait for sis and dad to come back.
mom asked if i can be alone.
of coz i can.

ok ah.
staring at the screen gives me a headache.

life.

2005-05-22T23:40:00.000+08:00

i'm having a high fever.
39.57 degrees celsius to be exact.
is that high?
i think so.
i feel like collapsing.
this is the effect of someone who has just started working
for the 1st time ever in her entire life.
the effect of going into an airconditioned environment,
to out in the open,
to standing a long time,
to skipping her meals.
it has taken a toll on my body.
but the funny thing is, i don't feel like quitting.
not coz i don't want to.
but i want to taste my 1st ever pay by sweating it out.
i'm a weak person with weak immune system.
serious.
but i don't want people to say i'm weak.
no way.
argh.

poor mom. she's so worried sick about me.
she wants me to stop working this line
and find a proper job.
but i can't see myself working in an office environment,
a 9-5 job.
that's so not me.
haiz.
tell me what am i supposed to do.

Starhub is having this promotion for non-subscribers
to watch all Starhub channel for free.
for one whole month, you'll get to watch AXN, HBO etc.
but only one channel a day.
so if u miss a channel,
TOO BAD. hehe.
tune your tv till you see it.
and since my family isn't subscribing to HBO,
and currently, HBO is free at Channel 01,
my dad has been watching it from just now.
he intends to subscribe to it.
lah.

yoda is such a beautiful creature.
he really is.
i need to buy episode 4, 5 and 6.
i want to get turned on watching yoda.
hahahahaha...

so i'll be working on tuesday, wednesday, thursday and sunday.
all 8 hours each.
the manager wants to speed up my training.
but he doesn't know that it's tiring.
haiz.
my sis said suffer now, later2, can relax.
yeah right.
tell that to my body.

oh! being a trainee means, not knowing what to do
but you are being trained to do what you are supposed to do.
so don't act as though i supposed to know everything
and anything like you do.
i've only work for like 3 times!
not like months or years like any of you ok.
fuck. don't use that tone on me.
but nvm, i'll just do my job and pretend you don't even exist.
you are pretty but seriously stucked up.

i want to be independant.
i don't want to be the spoilt brat who depends on her parents for EVERYTHING.
yes, i lead a good life.
my family has my back.
but i need to stand up on my own.
why am i talking so ye-ye tonight?
heh.

ok ah.
i want to sleep.
tmr, i'll need to go for my typhoid jab.
will it be painful?
hope not.

and i've 116 pictures to upload.
mati ar.

edited//
k. photos up.

my 1st time...

2005-05-21T02:08:00.000+08:00

1st day:
learnt a whole new term to the word "bus." or "bussing."
it means, cleaning up the utensils, wiping the tables clean,
basically, cleaning up when the customers have left the tables.
khairin helped me to make COD.
that's Coffee of the Day people.
tiring. backbreaking. but fun.
although i couldn't wait to go home.
the big big people of starbucks were there at suntec.
one of them came up to me and welcomed for joining starbucks.
and she commented that i have such a nice smile.
oh. thank u honey.

2nd day:
both siblings suck my blood.
i'm just kidding.
khai taught me how to make frap.
cool shit.
i need help with drink calling.
that is when the cashier calls out the drink to the baristas makin fraps,
the baristas have to call back what the cashier has just said.
understand?
erm.. yeah.

so. i think i can manage.
my sister told me not to drop her water face.
how could she?
nvm, i'm a blur cock.
i know my ownself.
but i think i can manage.

shaikhah, thanks for dropping by.
and tell ur fren, i'll tell u when is khai's schedule k.
muhahahahaha..

so to my girlies:
my schedule for sunday is 7am to 1.30pm.
yes, i'm doing opening.
so i have to wake up at 5 am.
that's right, FIVE am.
in the morning.
please help.

darth varder, here i come.
yoda, you many many i heart.

new pics will be up soon.
how soon.
dono ah.

*yawn*

so long. and goodbye.

2005-05-19T00:50:00.000+08:00

2 years of ITE life in ITE MacPherson has come to an end.
took my final examination and it was hell. i didn't study ah.
anyway, we took pictures, we took everything,
the lift, the lockers, the corridors, toilets, almost everything.
it was heartbreaking to know that we won't be stepping foot into that building
again as students.

all the crushes, the loudness, the smoking session, the eating, drinking parts, the fights, i'll sorely missed.
alif said it best.
read his blog to know how we all feel.

and yes. i respect u hanif for shaking our hands.
seriously.

to my wonderful class of MMT2X, seriously i couldn't ask for a better class.
the great times we all spent laughing at one another couldn't be replaced.

to alif, khus:
u both know how much u both mean to me. thank u for always being there. and pampering me.

kin:
thank u for always telling me to be independant but at the same time pamper me as though i'm the younger one. hehe.

fir, faliq:
the brothers. always there to listen to me crapping. thanks!

tweet:
hey kinky boy. no more cold hands to turn u on eh? go and flatten that tummy in tekong.

khai:
oh! the boy who gave me my 1st work! hahahaa.. corniness is your virtue. keep it up.
see u at work dude.

to my other schoolmates, and also schoolmates-cum-blogmates, i'll see u guys around.
all the best. take care!

*sob*

goodbye training stint.hello working life.

2005-05-18T00:25:00.000+08:00

i made 4 drinks today during training.
a cappucino, a latte, a mocha and an americiano.
did i spell the last drink right?
oh fuck it.
anyway, the learning coach was happy with all the drinks i've made
and she even drank my latte and commented that it was good.
how happy.
my sis said it runs in the family.
like, hello, only u and i are working in starbucks.
crazy.
steaming milk and making espresso have never been so much fun.

so trainings had been fun.
gonna miss going to tanjong pagar.
haha. siao.
i'll be working at the store soon.
can't wait for that.
and the joy of earning my first ever pay.
i'm so gonna splurge it.
yeap yeap. not just on myself.
i know how to divide my money.
and khai, don't worry, i won't get u into trouble u toad.

having my exams tmr.
last day of skool.
oh man.
i've been repeating this story for how many days already.
but really, i'll miss school so much.
i'm starting to tear now.
*sniff*

the hobbits in my class are planning a seoul garden dinner tmr after our paper.
i really wanna go but i've no kaching.
how great.
probably won't go just coz i don't have any smackeroos.
anyone wanna sponsor 1st?
haha.kidding ah k.

i miss my girlies of kallangcs!
where u all???
faizah??wani??

nobody spew vulgarities at my family and get away with it.
NO ONE.
not even if i love that person to death.
for the fact that u're an elder, i still respect u.
and for the fact that this is my blog
and i've the convenience to type anything i want,
a big FUCK YOU to u.

and a big GOOD LUCK and GOOD NIGHT to me.
for my paper today and i need my sleep.

sumatra, kenya, guatemala. WHATEVER!

2005-05-17T02:27:00.000+08:00

i'm too caffeinated already.
drank 5 cups of different types of unsweetened, pure blackness coffee, no sugar added.
we were asked to differentiate the taste, the body, the aroma of the coffees.
and you know what?
i couldn't differentiate them at all.
they all taste the same!!!!!
how the fuck should i taste for acidity in all the coffees?
by the time i drank the 2nd coffee, my tongue went numb.
and i think by the time i finish my training stint,
i'll have a nightmare on coffee beans.
help me someone?

so today will be my last training stint at GB Building.
made friends whom are all fun people.
i think i'll miss the fun of training there.
but i'll be serving people, so i guess it'll be more fun!
anxious, scared but i can't wait for work to start!
i just can't help but say this, I'M WORKING, PEOPLE!

and i wonder why the people who train us,
love to look at me and ask me to smile.
or they'll call out my name and they smile
and so in turn i'll smile.
like, why?
and they are all girls!

exam is around the corner.
on the 18th to be exact.
it will be my last day of school too.
good things has come to an end in my life.
but i'm know greater things are to come!
:)

pictures of the chalet will be up soon.
oh wait. i'm not sure if i want to put it up also.
i'm so fucking lazy to upload them.

i need a back massage.
everyone? anyone? someone??

//edited.
Check this out:
Go www.gv.com.sg and click on 'buy tickets', go to the 'change date', click on the 20th.

you see what u get?
All Star Wars.
hahahaha.. cool shit.

sing me a lullaby pls

2005-05-16T02:19:00.000+08:00

i've watched:
-The Amityville Horror
[oh..my..god. scary fuck. good show. all of my cousins were freaked out.]
-House of Wax
[paris hilton died in a gore but sexy way. starting was a bore.]

So i'm left with:
-Star Wars
[darth varder is cool. light sabres are cooler. but yoda the coolest is .]
-Initial D
[jay chou rocks]
-Sin City
[josh, elijah. haiz. what more can i say?]

And i suddenly feel like watching:
-Kingdom of Heaven
[ok, for orlando]
-Premonition
[it just look like a great scary movie]

All i need now:
-MONEY
-$$$$$
-Smackeroos

--------
2nd day of training on the 13th was good.
i talked to everyone already.
basically, i couldn't care less if they think i'm crazy
but i was dying of boredom not talking to anyone.
peed in the boys' toilet coz the girls' toilet was locked
and i couldn't be bothered to ask for the key.
the person who taught us said i was cute.
and the rest couldn't believe i was 20.

13th-15th was my cousins' chalet.
it was fun.
madness. my cousins are great fun people.
i love them.
we bowled, watched a 2.30am show.
smuggled my 15 yr old cousin in.
NC16 mah the show.

today is another training day at 6pm.
sian-ness.
pray for me that i'll survive going home alone.

pretty much, that's about it.
i'm just too tired.
i need my sleep.

anyone wanna sing me a lullaby?

how do the people who made the new tastier dog food know its tastier?

2005-05-13T00:32:00.000+08:00

i had fun during my FOUR hours training.
there are 12 people in the class and there are only 2 girls, me included.
4 chinese guys, the rest all malay, including me and the girl.
i can't click with the girl coz she's.....
well, let's say she thinks she knows it all.
which i have to admit that she does.
but, it doesn't harm to shut up and pretend not to know what!
i think she is a former barista.
oh well.
and kin, no cute guys. so cannot intro ah.
if got also, not ur kind of guy.
wait ah eh, i start work, got customers cute2, i intro them to u ok.

my menses cramps made it hard for me though.

i really can't believe i'm working.
AYU IS WORKING!!!

ok. today is another training day for me.
again, 6-10pm.
great.
i'm having fun, seriously.
but the drinking coffee part suck alot.
coz u guys shd know i don't drink coffee
and the coffe they let us tasted were all unsweetened and no sugar whatever.
pure black coffee that are fucking bitter.
so now i can't sleep.

will be having my in store training on the 19th.
i so can't wait.
pls let khai be the one to train me.
coz at least i won't be so stressed.
but hope khai won't go hard on me!
jgn eksen ar!
and yes, wani called me last night
and she said she'll come to the store everytime i'm working.:D

good question here by alif:
how do the people who made the new tastier dog food know its tastier?
dogs can't answer.
so do the people taste it themselves?
eeeewwwww..

ok. my back is hurting.

i'm excited, sad, scared, anxious. oh wat the hell.

2005-05-12T00:06:00.000+08:00

Excited:
i'll be starting my training today.
at 6 in the evening.
at tanjong pagar at capital tower.
will be meeting new girls [note: girls. i can't get along with girls well.],
learning new things. will be working.
and i'll be an independant toad soon too.
u guys shd know how DEPENDANT i am to other ppl especially my loved ones and friends.
The Kids should know. HEH.

Scared:
same as the above. i've a thing of meeting new people.
i'm friendly. too friendly at times.
i can click with almost everyone.
but meeting new people, i tend to look fierce.
i don't know why, i'll just start to frown
but by the end of the day, i'll start smiling.

Sad:
Basically, just now, was my unofficial last day of school.
Last day is on the 18th, my examination day.
so we don't need to come to school till then.
there was a tinge of sadness in the AVA room.
i can feel it. and when i shook hands with my other classmates,
we were like, "jumpe kat luar tegor eh!"
[say hi when we meet outside eh!]
and the guys went, "jumpe kat dlm tekong!"
[meet in tekong!]
sweetness.
i'll blog about my ITE life after the 18th. :(
i'll miss ITE life.

Anxious:
Reality hit me hard just now.
What am i going to do after school now?
go Higher Nitec?
can i make it through Higher Nitec with my GPA which i doubt will be enough?
should i start working?
oh god. this is the time i wish i am back in school.

---------------------------
Project presentation just now was rocking.
like kin had said, i think my group and hers are the only uncomplete and mepekest one.
good effort by alif n tweet for doing all the jobs for khus n me and kin n khai respectively.
we 4 are eternally grateful for you 2.
i love how simple yet stunning the video made by my clsmates, reza, hus, sylvester and jian bao.
very emo, very touching, very sweet, very sad and so A Walk To Remember.
and the rest of the groups had put in alot of effort.
good job!
and oh, note to self, prepare something when have to present a project.
heh.

so wish me luck guys!
i need it!

i need a book.

2005-05-10T17:28:00.000+08:00

the last time i read was...
3 weeks ago?
and it's quite long for my standards.
i love to sit in the library alone
and go to one corner and get myself engrossed in a book.
or i could just lie in bed all day, without caring to eat, or bathe
and finish the whole damn book.
i'm mad and weird like that about books.
ok enough.

school is ending soon in a week or so time.
i'll miss it so much.
it has been a great big chunk of my life.
this is where i've met great friends,
this is where i've experienced life stuffs and matters,
this is where i've many crushes and
this is where i've fall in love and fell out of love.
and guess what, for almost 2 years, i've never fell or slip in school.
yesterday, the embarrassment, i slipped and fell on my right knee.
and it was grazed so badly that now i have blue black grazed knee that hurts a little when i walk. coolness. thank god no one saw it.
only fir n alif.
and blardy hell did they laugh at me.
hrmph!

pity alif though that he had to do most of our projects alone.
editing the 2 videos took alot of time and effort and blardy hell patience.
and he's not really a patient guy.
kudos to him.
i'm so ashamed of myself. i nv even help him a single bit.
sorrrrrry.. wait i blanje u ice cream k.
and i'll probably put up our video projects here one day!

rob thomas is now a solo artist.
i loved matchbox twenty.
they were a great band.
they had great hits and they were easy to the ears.
sometimes i think my heart goes to alternative music more than anything else.
but i know i'll listen to anything except techno, trance shits.
anyway, about rob thomas.
he is so hot now i can scald myself just by watching him.
and look at the bon bon shaking in the video, "Lonely No More."
*swoon*
that song is catchy.

isn't my layout simple?
it is.
i love simplicity.
i'm a girl who like simple things in life.
but i tend to make simple things complicated.
does it mean i love simple things or complicated things?
or does it mean i love complicating simple things?
i dono. i'm complicated person to figure out at times.
i'm digressing right now. i know.
don't mind me.
i think i'm weird.
well, weird is not that strong a word.
i'm just unique in my own way.
totally out of point.

the cousins's chalet is on this friday.
i'm not sure if i'll have training on that day
coz my training starts this thursday.
like finally.
but if i do have training on friday,
i probably will come to the chalet later.
duh.
i wouldn't miss the chalet for the world.

i think my computer loves me alone.
it wouldn't switch on for anyone else, except me.

i've never said how much i love sengkang.
well, now i do. heh.

and i've never tried using a tampon before.
it's so weird to insert something into me.
and reading shidah's blog made me all quesy using a tampon.
erk.

and i want to go jalan kayu and eat the pratas.
i'm having crazy craving for the pratas there i can go nuts.
luckily jalan kayu is near.

the bottomline is,
i want to read a book.
somebody be so kind as to pay my overdue fines for me?

i'm good. and Happy Mothers' Day.

2005-05-08T23:51:00.000+08:00

friday was a mad day.
my mum suffered the same stomach problems as me
and she looked as if she was dying.
sis and me were crying our eyes out and bro looked so panicked
i swore i could laugh but i didn't of coz.
dad came back from work, 2 hours after he had left the house for work.
and then the sweetest thing was,
the WHOLE family accompanied me n mum to the doc.
mum and me went into the doc at the same time.
the doctor said we had air in our stomachs.
and the family ended up eating at macs.
sweetness.

after dat, met up wif alif, khus, khai n nas.
walked. walked. walked.
tiring.
classic reaction from alif n nas
when they saw a girl sitting a little non-too-discreetly.
they actually looked away!
not like some guys!
cool shit.

so i'm ok.
my stomach still feels alittle funny.
but i guess it will have to get used to food now.

mom's ok too.
i'm glad.
i love her so much, i wouldn't want to see her in that state ever again.
she is so precious to everyone in the family.
and to her, Happy Mothers' Day Mom!
muacks!

ok. i better go.
thanks for all the wishes darlings.
:D

what the hell.

2005-05-05T23:35:00.000+08:00

since my computer decided to be good tonight,
and i'm still feeling abit under the weather,
thus causing me to have a writer's block,
not that i'm a good writer in the 1st place,
i've decided to take some questions from 8 days and put it up here.
answers are all by me, of coz.

What would you do if a hottie you're eyeing across the room has body odour?
omg. i'll cry for the shame. hahaha.. just kidding. i'll probably try not to look at him and forget that he's there.

Would you rather a guy have bad taste or bad breath?
i can work out his bad tasteness but bad breath? i want to kiss him, not puke on him!

Should a guy pick up the tab on the 1st date?
it's much more gentlemanly and thoughful of him to do so on the 1st date. subsequent dates, i'll offer to pay. but i won't make it a habit!

Hot, sexy action or cosy cuddles?
i so prefer the cuddles. give me cuddles anytime and i'll be eternally grateful to you. heh.

Which do you prefer on your man: boxers, briefs or G-strings?
i think guys look weird with g-strings on. and unless u're freddie ljungberg in calvin kleins advertiments, don't tink about wearing the briefs. preferably, with nuthing on top, but just a boardshorts. wow. dat's hot.

ok da.
i'm bored ah. dat's y.
and i'm still sick.

direct from lj. and something else.

2005-05-05T15:40:00.000+08:00

i am sick since yesterday.
a fever dat made me cold to the touch although it was HOT yesterday.
wore a sweater and i still felt cold.
swallowed 3 panadols.
i tink it was a mistake.
i've never ate 3 panadols in one go.

so i ended up puking every single thing dat was put into my mouth.
for the whole lot of yesterday, i didn't eat a single thing.
went home, dad fed me 2 mouthful of rice.
bad mistake again, i puked the whole thing out.
woke up at 1am to puke.
and again at 2am, 3am, 5am, 7am, 8am and again at 9am to puke.
so u can say, i didn't have a good night sleep.

the worst ever was at 5am, where i had just finished puking
and i decided to lie down in bed
but i could feel the vomit building up again.
rushed to the toilet and puked again.
and my vomit was so blackish and so thick that i actually cried.
i looked such a sad sight, kneeling on all fours in the toilet.

it sucked big time to be puking alot when dere wasn't anything in your stomach.
and when i said dere wasn't anything in my stomach,
i really mean it.
i didn't eat a single thing at all yesterday.
alif fed me a nugget and some fries
and khus gave me some fries,
that too went out from my system.

right now, my brain is swimming in my head.
i feel so drained out from puking alot.
just finished eating porridge.
i can feel it wanting to come out but i'm forcing it down.
i can't walk. if i could, i would have gone to the doctor.

watched Wet Dreams with the usual suspects except for faliq on Tuesday.
dat show is so funny, hilarious and outright dirty.
i laughed so hard coz well.. it is damn hilarious.
now i see cup noodles in a different light.

and do u noe how glad am i dat pool won?
very. fuck mourinho and chelsea.
too bad joe cole, frank lampard, john terry and damien duff
are chelsea players.
they are cute.
heh.

alright. i need to rest.

my com's a bitch.

2005-05-02T23:55:00.000+08:00

i shdn't really say dat as my title.
sometimes i tink my com understand wat i always say.
when i sayang2 it, it will switch on.
when i maki2 it, it will be so stubborn and will not switch on.
so computer, i sayang u ok.

went to farid's house yesterday
and my girlies were dere!
thanks to wani, faizah, lydia, mai, ida
for taking care of me. muacks!
and thanks to wak for the talk.
didn't noe i could talk to u. :D

just got back from simpang bedok.
do wat? wat else, makan ah.
wif alif, khus, zuck, syadie, din, dzafir, tweet and MONirah
now i'm hungry back again.
serve me right for not finishing a piece of egg prata.
and oh! i went to pee right after Randall Tan peed.
hahahaha.. he is so cute, my goodness.

tot i get to stay home tmr.
but there's an MMD test tmr.
damn it.
so skool, here i come.

flirting is a crime.
dat's y i don't do it.
:D

ok. bye.

my weekends! A B-L-A-S-T!

2005-05-01T01:59:00.000+08:00

friday:
arcade rawked my friday.
after then, proceeded to watch XXX with alif, khai n khus.
cute right? 4 ppl. quite pathetic, quite sad but very cute.
we watched the 9.30pm show at bugis.
and dad wasn't pissed with me when i got home at 12.45am.
and XXX was great. i love it.

saturday:
went to Singapore Poly to watch the ITE Stardom 2005.
of coz ah 2005. takkan 2001 rite?
haiz. corny.
i had so much fun screaming for I Remember May,
the band with tweet, zuck, zad n khai in it.
and the supporters, namely, Alif, Khus, Syikin, Fir, Faliq, MONirah, Inn, Fad(with his ever blowing whistle), Suhayl, Rab, Sam, Zanna, Syadie, Kodil, Ikay and me
were having so much fun.
[i took all the names from alif's blog. i can't remember all.]

of coz, we went crazy when I Remember May won the best band.
it was crazy. i was jumping around the front of the stage, screaming,
touching zuck's hand, waving madly at the rest of them.
and ppl were pushing and shoving me.
securities had to pushed us all away and i was being knocked on the head.
hahahaha.. but i had fun so i let that rest.
now my throat is sore.

and faliq had the chance to usher eunice olsen to the stage.
and she gave him a big round of applause
and the guy ended up smelling his hand.
gosh.
and kumar is the sexiest dere.

got back home around 12.50am.
thanx to nas for fetching me.
i dono how i could ever thank him.
desperate times call for desperate measures.
dat's y i had to call him.
sorry faizah, i had to use ur boyfren.

pictures will be up.
i won't announce when.
just keep looking at the usual column to see if they are there or not.
:)

this is truly a weekend to remember.
thanks to all for making me happy. heh.

bye.

// edit.
k ah.
pics are up. heh.
some are abit dark, abit blur.
but wtf. enjoy.

i want my mr brightside

2005-04-28T23:44:00.000+08:00

so i came to skool just now just to take my test papers.
i've been wasting my mornings waking up early
just to go to skool for a few minutes.
but meeting up with my pals are what i enjoyed the most.

how could my Constantine be out??
how could he!!
i'll miss his pout, his lips, his sexy eyes, his long legs, his curly hair.
oh my god.
blind u americans, blind!

and i tink fann wong looks so pretty wearing eyeliner.
she is a pale person by nature
and so when she wears it, it immediately stands out.
pretty lah.
and dat character tracy, is hot.
she has a hot bod.
wow.

i want a new fone.
coz my N7610 is a bore now.
it's totally passe to own a 7610 nowadays.
everyware u go, someone is holding a N7610.
damnation.

my friend, dzafir needs a woman.
anyone who likes to be friends with him
or wants to be his girlfriend,
please click on my link and tag him
or can apply through my tag board.
thank u! :D

i can't wait for the cousins' chalet!
i can't wait!!!!!
the girls are going skinny dipping!!
hahahahaha.. woah..
so if anyone of u see some naked ladies,
pls don't peep.

and the girlies of kallangcs are going to go newton to eat!!
we gonna gorge and pig ourselves silly.
and den, more gossipping to come!
when? i have no idea...
and erm.. wani will be dere too... ahem.. ahem!!

i seriously dono wat to blog about anymore.
so many things to say but i have to be discreet.
i hate to hide.
fuck.

and i want my mr brightside.
where art thou?
heh. i'm going shakespearian.
and i'm not even sure i've said it correctly.
wateva.

somebody has stolen my heart and you are my prime suspect

2005-04-27T22:34:00.000+08:00

one of my friends in msn has my title for a nick.
hence, dat's y i took it for my title.
style ah. but corny.

went to skool in vain.
reached skool and it was break time.
and since tweet wanted to go home,
khus, alif n me came to my place.
so basically, i went skool, just to go canteen.
cool shit kan.

i had fun today although skool was a bore.
i just love talking.
talk and talk and talk.
i can go on and on but i don't want to piss some ppl off.
that's why i tend to keep quiet nowadays.
hahahaha..

and i love asking questions.
especially trivial question and irrelevant questions.
u can see if someone is a patient person or not
by the way he/she answers u.

when the heck is my debarment list coming out?
i'm getting lazy to go skool.

mum said not to talk about the weather.
just accept wateva God has given us.
but can i say sumthing still?
it has been freaking hot and humid nowadays.
i can squeeze myself and my clothes
and it will be full of perspiration.
yucks.
and today, i've bathed 4 times.
nice.

tonight liverpool vs chelsea.
i'll most probably watch it.
i so want liverpool to win it.
i'll be damn proud if liverpool does win dis match,
even though i hate them
and i sure noe dat history and previous matches statistics
shows dat luck and logic explaination is not on their side.

ok.bye.

life.

2005-04-27T00:58:00.000+08:00

unpredictable at times, life.
but i'm loving it.
what's the point of looking back to ur past and regretting it?
i'm not the kind to look back and regret.
sure, i do remember my past
but it's not sumthing i'll harp on over and over again.
coz the people around me would always be dere for me no matter wat.
they make me happy, even though some would be so shitty
as to hurt me over and over again.

had a girls evening to night out wif some of the girlies
from kallangcs.
faizah, lydia, mai and ida.
wani couldn't make it but she promised to come for the next one.
i hold u to dat, woman!

u noe, it's great to just talk and talk with no hindrance watsoeva.
we all talked about our problems and our misgivings on everything in life.
we cried, hugged and kissed.
it was such a great therapy.
we shd do it again, girls.
and dis time, make sure the rest can come!
pics are up.
little, coz we spent our tym talking than taking pics.
and yes, i noe i looked tired and irritating.
but dat's just me. so shut up and just view them.

the blardy taxi driver went a longggggg way.
to cte and den pie.
kan slenge kan.
charged me $10.90 for a ride that usually cost me 8 bux.
kannasai.
$2 pon. duit kan tu. lepas mee soto kat skolah.

orite. i'm not sleepy.
but i'm just too tired to blog any further.
and damn, i so wanna watch Sin City.

when love and hate collide

2005-04-25T23:19:00.000+08:00

i'm in love.
i reali am.
with who, u may ask?
with myself.
hahahahha..

thanks to one of my friends who messaged me while i was watching Infection,
which, i think, is such a nonsense show
which, i think, has a great storyline
but isn't scary at all,
my ego was boosted by 9 198 181 187%.
thank you fariz!
hahahaha..
ask me nicely and i'll tell you why!
and yeah, alif n khus, don't get jealous ok!
hahahaha..

oh yeah, the part which the ghost didn't come out,
i screamed out loud.
and the whole theatre was laughing at me.
alif n khus had to tell me that they were laughing at me.
i noe okkkkk..

see my title?
that was one of Deff Leppard hits.
i loved dat song.
and i was in love wif the lead singer of the DL.
hahahaha.. weird rite?

talking about in love with someone,
i wanna watch Sin City.
oh my god.
pretty people acting alert!
there are JESICCA ALBA!, brittany murphy, alexis biel [?] (the girl who plays rory in gilmore girls)
and of coz, the guys. MY MEN: JOSH HARTNETT AND ELIJAH WOOODDD!!!
i'm sure most of u know how madly in love i am wif Elijah.
he was the bomb in The Good Son.
cool shit.

received alot of news regarding my sec skool mates.
hahahaha..
all good, all good.
i'm happy.

and one of my greatest sec skool mates, suria
sent me via MSN dis Naruto ep entitle, The Narutrix.
it was soo cool!
i haf to send it to alif.
dat dude is mad about naruto.
and i tink kakashi is hot.

hope alif's bro will get better.
he will be! coz he has dat guy for a 2nd big bro.
:)

skool was ok.
i'll be getting lazier to go skool.
u can bet on it.
and i'll be missing skool when i graduate. :(

and tomorrow, probably having a girls evening out
with my gals,
wani, faizah n lydia.
any of u guys wanna come?
hahahaha..

oh! the indonesian band, Peterpan,
they have gorgeous members!!
the singer, the keyboardist are soooooo cuteee and fine!!
my my.

dun mind my hyperactiveness.
i was worried sick just now so i drank a full mug of coffee.
and my frenz shd noe how much i hate coffee.
so now, i'm feeling quite fresh and so hyper.
damn.
my bro even told me to shut up.
hhahahaha..

ok bye.

reminisce

2005-04-24T22:40:00.000+08:00

dis is so fun!
i'm chatting wif alif
and we asked all dis, "when was the 1st tym we talk to each other?" kinda questions.
and dat guy has a very good memory!
i wanna ask the rest of the kids also ah!
cool kan.

went retail therapy wif my sister in law to be.
i wanted to buy alot of stuffs
but frankly, compass point is such a fucking sucky place to shop at.
wanted to go town but frankly, even i myself thought it was too far.
so, no tshirts or pants or anything but i bought myself undergarments.
cute prints on underwear does it for me.
with bras of alot of colours.
i love cute underwear. hahahaha..
so guys, if u wanna buy things for me, buy for me cute underwear.
thanx.

so now i'm left wif an amount i noe i can finish in a day but i won't.
i can save 10 bux for 3 weeks ok without feeling the need to spend it.
so i'm left with 30. prolly saving it also.
i'm so thrifty sometimes i scare myself.
and if i spend, i scare myself too.
cool.

man u vs newcastle.
oh my. i dun tink i bother watching already.

ok. dat's about it.
bye.

pressplay!

2005-04-23T01:56:00.000+08:00

walked ard town is tiring.
especially so if u haf frenz who are so hyper active
and love walking.
but it's all great fun.
i love my frenz!
n yeah, monIRAH n kin, u guys juz dono when to stop window-shopping.
cool shit.

ate at dis place at cineleisure basement.
the food sux.
urgh.

bought a storybook for a dollar at Plaza Singapura.
don't ask me y.
i juz felt lyk buying it.

so now i'm eating roti wif milk.
at 2.26am.
cool kan.

i get all my inspiration to blog in the toilet.
but when i come out from the toilet, i'll forget wat to blog about.
weird kan?

oh lela, it's still not time yet to blog about u.
muahahaha.. i'll promise u, it'll be soon.

the bro's 5 minit semangat has waver.
the xbox is collecting dust.

and dis com can suck my dick if i haf one.

like finally!

2005-04-22T00:23:00.000+08:00

like finally, i can log in blogger.
fuck. been causing me misery for the past hour.
couldn't log in.
panicked for a moment dere.
yes, i can panicked if i can't update my blog.
sad life i lead.

n like finally, someone from ur group decided to come up to us.
i was pleasantly surprised.
but den, he doesn't really count as someone from ur group ah?
as far as we all are concerned, he's neutral isn't he?
i apologise for putting him in a spot.
but i don't tink apologies are needed for the rest of u.
u guys can go suck some dicks and we won't care.
i rest my case.
but i noe u n u n u n u won't.

won't be going to skool tmr.
coz we juz hate presentation.
not other reason. we dun hate confrontation.
we juz hate presentating our project,
which isn't even half done.
muhahahahha...

suhaylah, i'll talk about u some days.
i nid to find inspirations.
oh, for ur infos, she is my sec skool mate. :)
not my classmate! NO!

have i mention dat mom is the best?
i have?
ok, i'll tell u guys again:
MY MUM IS THE BEST EVA!

i dono wat else to blog animore.
actually, i do haf alot to blog about.
it's juz dat, it seems childish to fight in blogs.
so i won't continue. heh.

oklah. bye!

i'm so fucking slpy n u're stupid.

2005-04-20T23:01:00.000+08:00

i shd cut down on surfing the net n chatting on MSN.
coz it's been consuming my sleep.
i'll be aslp by 4+ and i'll be awake by 7.
cool shit or wat?
and by the tym i reach skool, i'll be lyk a zombie.
so i tink, eh, i KNOW i shd cut down on the com.

watched Hitch juz now at fir's place.
it was great!!!!!
i noe, u guys must be tinking i'm so outdated.
but i didn't manage to watch it when it was in the movies wat!
oh my.. IF ONLY all guys are as smooth as Alex Hitchen.
:P

i'm an insecure fuck.
i reli am.
if things aren't confirmed or wateva, i'll be an even more uptight insecure fuck.
so dun mind me.
pls carry on wif ur work, thank u.

fir is a smart ass.
he can be a hacker for all i noe.
but dat's not hacking.
dat's using his brains.
view source.
smart boy.
n u're plain stupid.

oh. tweet is getting horny.
heh.

orite ppl.
bye!

mom is my bestie.

2005-04-19T23:44:00.000+08:00

no matter which frenz i'm close wif,
whom i'm willing to die for,
mom would be the one whom i could talk from morning till night.
sure, she nags. which mom doesn't?
but overall, she listens.
she nv interrupt when i talk.
she nv scold me if i reason wif her properly.
she listens. she rawks my world.
and i thank her for listening to me juz now.
i thank her for everything she did and still does.
thank u so much.

ok, *wipes tears*, i had fun dis few days.
my frenz have been great.
i <3 u guys too. :)

so tmr, dere's prolly be about 3 hours break.
so u tell me, wat the fuck are we gonna do for 3 hours.
damn sian k.

to suhaylah, i will write about u another day!
today lazy ah minah!

oh puhhhllleeasssee.. TELL THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD!!
i'm the bad girl orite?
thanks ehhhh..

new pics are up.

ATTENTION:

2005-04-19T13:23:00.000+08:00

don't mind my frenz/rappers wif the previous post.

i'll be back wif an entry, update by MYSELF, when i get home.

:)

//EDIT
OMG AYU TRIED TO UPDATE THE BLOG WITHOUT ME....

BUT NVM I WONT UPDATE ON HER BLOG BUT I KNOW I JUST DID..

HI THIS IS THE ERASED MELONCHOLY NIGHTMARE

2005-04-19T12:17:00.000+08:00

Alif(EMINEM)
Yaw yaw, wassup ma dawgs. Right now, it's been cool. I'm touring with Jin and Jay-Z on the rap warped tour sponsored by VANS TRANSPORT. Yeah, right now it's our guest singer, Usher doing his number, "YEAH" on the stage. It's all cool. Thanks to our manager Dayu Noti 2 Shorty. Yeah. I just like to say, I'm cute, and maybe, that one day, there was a pig. The pig name was Wahab. Wahab was a good pig. He used to love making fun of me, Jin and Jay-Z. Sad to say, it will be the last time, he ever made fun of us, cause we made bacon out of him. Sorry Wahab, you will be dearly missed. We were too hungry. I dedicate this song, "WHITE AMERICA" cause it's all pigs there, and maybe, just maybe one day, we will find another Wahab.
I'm crying right now as I type this out. Let this be an unopen letter to the world. YES! Still cute la. I'm thinking of adding some Singlish words into my new album, cause I still love Singapore. HELLO SINGAPORE. That was my last time I said that out loud infront of my 30 billion fans. Maybe, just maybe, we will be together, Singapore. Cheers mate. I'm going Australian. I end this with a beautiful number I wrote...

I dono la ask them the rappers.
Or shud I wear the pampers.
Ive found a reason.
in this season.
apple apple energy.
i use synergy.
maybe one day i'll be famous
and all day eat famous amos.
white america.
suck me hukalasha.
who's bukalasha.
she's someone from america
yo yo
po yo
la la
lo la
im eminem
and i love m&m
it melts in ur mouth.
and opposite of north is south.
east to the west
west to the east
death to bitch
that touches my witch.

bye yaw. its been beautiful..

Fir(JIN)

My name is JIN and mayb i shy
Come little girl and suck mine
If u r cute blow my flute
blow hard and don puke..
AKU JIN!
I've SIN!
Maybe not now,
OK bye..

Tweet(Jay-Z)
One day i found an apple
It is red like my nipple
If u wan to c my masterpiece
Come to A-TOWN at least

1-2-3-4
Aku dari Singapore
5-6-7-8
Sape nak ikut aku gi date

Yo-Yo Encore
Do u wan more?
Dial 93866074
Do u wan more?

DAYU(MANAGER)
Yes, this is the manager speaking. I just like to say, support local music. Maybe, just maybe, all my 3 rappers are so damn cute. I HAVE THE SENSATIONAL EMINEM WHO IS ALIF AND DAMN CUTE. AND I HAVE THE FASTEST BEST RAPPER, JAY-Z. AND JIN, OUR SHY RAPPER, WHO'S ONE OF THE BEST, AND DAMN CUTE TOO.
I WANT TO BE CUTE LIKE THEM.
BUT LIFE FORBIDS
SOMEWHERE... OVER THE RAINBOW.
THERE IS NO RAINBOW..
THERE IS NO MATRIX..
THIS IS THE END..
===================================

Brought to you by blogger.com and Earandir Productions.
Visit alif blog @ http://thebeautifulnightmare.blogspot.com
Visit fir blog @ http://erased.blogspot.com
Visit tweet blog@ http://xmeloncholyx.blogspot.com

AND PLEASE, LEAVE A MESSAGE, SAYING THEY ARE CUTE.

i'm embarrassed. :)

2005-04-18T23:01:00.000+08:00

my back is in pain.
i dono y.
i can't sit still nor can i stand straight.
oh yeah, for ur info, i haf a crooked backbone/spine.
from top it's straight, but reaching the end, it crooks to my right.
it effects every.. erm.. 1/10 gals?
1/100? oh i dono.
my sis has it too.
cool shit rite?

Guess Who was ok.
ashton kutcher is my kinda guy.
goofy, cute n slack.
;)
and the story does hit me in the face.
but i dun care!

had a good day today although only khai, alif n me came.
rawking rite?
soooo slack.

i feel guilty.
yes i do.
but i dun feel the same way animore.
guilty n love are 2 different things.

oh well. bye.

ramblings.

2005-04-18T00:58:00.000+08:00

i had great fun wif the gals of kallangcs.
i'm so gonna miss u girls.
we shd mit up and haf a girls day out one day.
i'll miss crapping wif u girls.
especially faizah.
big kiss n big hugs from me to u gals.

sorry to break ur heart once again.
but i noe i can't run away from the facts.
i noe it isn't fair to u.
but it'll be more unfair to me if i force myself to be wif u.
for once, i nid to tink about myself.
i'm sorry. n pls dun wait.

pics will be up soon, kallangcs.
i'm lazy at the moment.

and speaking of lazy, i'm lazy to go skool.
hah. wat's new.
i received my 3rd warning letter the other day,
informing me dat i would be de-registered from my course.
ah crap. at the same tym i'm scared.
blardy hell, left a few more weeks till skool ends only!
knn lah.

some private entry at lj.
sorie, no friends-only for today. :)

till we meet again.

2005-04-17T01:41:00.000+08:00

thank u for everything.
u noe u've done more than enuf to salvage everything.
but i'm so sorry.
my heart is juz so stubborn.
may u be happy wif ur loved ones n new loved ones.
take care.

for once, i feel sad/happy at the same tym.
dun ask me y.
i noe y but i dun feel lyk telling.
well...maybe if u ask nicely.

thank u...

i'm juz so sleepy...

2005-04-15T23:20:00.000+08:00

i kept wondering.
am i being heartless?
girls, our hearts are much more gentle.
can be easily swayed or coaxed or persuaded.
but for now, my stubbornness has surprised even my own self.
i'm not happy doing it
but i noe it's for our own good.
n i'm happy to noe dat i'll benefit from it months, years from now.
i'll be more happy.
it's so worth the wait.

to him, thank u for understanding the talk we had last nite.
i'm sorie for being so harsh and rude towards u and all dat.
but i noe wat i've said was the truth and sincere and so true.
and i noe u'll haf a better life without me.
let's move on, stay as frenz.
we'll be better off dat way.

aniwae, prolly going to watch the gig at Planet Paradigm tmr.
see if i haf the kaching or the mood.
coz honestly.. nvm, i myself noe y.
hah. :)

for the 1st tym ever, i went n stayed in skool till 5 on a friday.
how cool is dat?
very.

and i'm getting to having a livejournal.
i'll prolly gonna delete blogger altogether and go private.
we'll see how.
when u all go a hunger strike, i won't delete my blog.
hahahaha..kidding..

i nid to change my layout.
so boring.

dancing in the rain.

2005-04-13T21:53:00.000+08:00

can i do dat?
can i?
i juz feel lyk dancing.
frankly, all my insecurities kinda disappear by those words.
hah.
but i myself noe dat some stuffs will happen
and i'll end up crawling into my shell again.
haiz.. being the victim of an abusive ex boyf has its consequences.
i am no longer the bubbly girl.
she's dead.
blah.

aniway, dad n mum are stressing me out.
help!
oh well, i can't help it dat i'm so busy at skool rite?
nvm. parents. i haf to bear dat in mind.

bored. bye.

&^^%^&&

2005-04-12T21:35:00.000+08:00

menses juz sux ok.
it juz plain sux.
and if no guys understands y majority of girls suffer from pms,
y they go all moody,
den could they pls haf the decency and courtesy to at least
be abit tactful and mindful of wat they said
ard girls who suffer from pms badly?
like me for example.
HAH.
no no, i'm juz giving warning to ppl.
no one said anything rude to me today.
gd for girls who can still be happy when they are having their menses.
lucky bitches.
hahahahah..

couldn't reli wake up for skool juz now.
so i slpt till 9 and reached skool at 11+.
heavens.
but now i'm all sleepy again.

cls was great.
tweet n faliq were dancing to reggae shits.
and they grind each other.
cool shit ah.

and i tink i reli suck lah.
bye.

so......

2005-04-11T21:30:00.000+08:00

i dun understand myself sumtyms.
if my attitude gonna be like dis,
i tink i'm gonna push some ppl away.
i'm so sorie. i do tink i am a nutcase.
maybe becoz i sound desperate?
or maybe becoz i sound clingy?
or maybe becoz i myself found myself to be a bit crazy.
wat a life.

aniwae, yesterday, i watched samara wif alif n khus at bugis.
samara sux big tym. it doesn't even worth a star.
maybe juz the top triangle of a star.
dat's it.
draggy, nonsense and full of crap.
but watching it wif them was fun!
we wasted 3/4 of the medium popcorn bucket throwing at each other.
by the tym the show ended, i left a trail of popcorn behind me.
it was a mess. i pity the cleaners.
will upload some pics.soon.
lazy bug has bit me.

this com is driving me more crazy than wat i actually am.
it will shut down by itself without any warning
and i'll be left wif a black screen alone.
so sad.
dat's y i'm typing dis out as fast as i can. hahahaha..

oh. i tink my training tak jadi on the 14th.
dono y lah.
haiz.. all i nid is a job to keep me occupied.

the previous entry was of coz, done by tweet.
so don't mind him ok.

ok lah. bored.

Tweet cutelah

2005-04-11T10:04:00.000+08:00

I eat one apple then two then three then four..After that i copy Tweet's labsheet so im cool nd so are you..The i go play computer then i play play till i sian then i sian again..Ok tmr we go Ngonjeng Ngonjeng with the Kids..Who are the Kids?I don noe ah ok bye?POKEWAK!!!

When the sun rises again, I'll be there for you my friend.

2005-04-10T11:38:00.000+08:00

this is scary.
was ready to go to bed dis morning at 5.
lied on my back and cuddled my smelly pillow
when suddenly i couldn't breathe properly.
i tried sleeping on my front and it didn't work.

got up, walked ard the house for awhile,
sit on the bed once again.
tried sleeping while sitting
but i was too shagged to stay still.
tried 3, 4 times of sleeping on my back and front
to no avail.

decided to wake my mum up.
i was already starting to kneel
and tried my best to breathe.
mum took mentholatum [spell?], a vicks like vapour rub.
she rubbed it on my back and front and she cuddled me to sleep.

dis is a rare occurance.
but dis is alot worse than i've ever experienced.
so scary, i tot i couldn't see the lights of the day today.
heh. dramatic, exaggerated. wateva.
it WAS very scary.
i was practically wheezing and beating my chest.

i tink i shd really cut down on drinking cold drinks,
biting ice cubes and smoking.
dis is getting out of hand.

but if i do die, pls remember, i love u all, my readers.
<3.

honesty is better than living a lie.

2005-04-10T01:41:00.000+08:00

try as i might, but my taik juz dowan to come out.
oh well. tmr is a new day.
can try somemore.

i've bin coughing non-stop.
it's so freaking irritating.
i min, i could be so fast aslp when suddenly i am awaken
by the sudden urge to cough.
and it's not just a cough and den dat's it.
it's a cough which look like i'm having a serious convulsion.

dis morning, someone send me a basket of flowers to my place.
thank u very much for them.
they are pretty.
i appreciate dat.

aniwae, in the evening juz now, my house had a syarahan.
the uztaz came my place to gif a talk
and almost everyone of my relatives came.
tym flew by pretty quickly especially when u are smsing ppl.
hahaha.. from 8.30 pm i was smsing till about 10.30pm.
and i didn't even hear a single thing.
busy smsing and gossipping wif my female cuzzens.
on top of dat, the uztaz talked wif a funny accent.
so yeah. it felt lyk an eternity.

amcm my layout?
ok ok lah eh.
i juz love the pic.
heh.

man u lost to norwich.
nabei.

sian to the max.
are u all feeling the same way?

I just feel so cool.

give that girl her food.

2005-04-09T02:00:00.000+08:00

watch The Pacifier wif the kids, minus faliq n khai
plus khus' gf, jas.
dat show rawk lah!
Vin Diesel is sooo sweet and cute in dat show.
and some parts of the story is so touching ok.
kin n me almost teared at those parts.
poor fir had to endure our yakkings coz he sat between us.
i tink rite, those who sat between me n kin are very suay.
hahahah.. i dono y.

aniwae, we saw dis cute, chubby and sooo handsome baby boy.
he was wif his parents who are so damn young looking.
late 20s probably.
and they let him roam around the street of town
while they look from afar.
we were lyk kissing him, cooing him, disturbing him, taking pics wif him
and the parents juz smile.
sooo fat... the legs are soo chicken wings like.
i took a pic wif him.
hope kin will upload soon.

rite now, waiting for my big bro to come back home.
i can't wait to eat my food coz i'm so freaking hungry!
and i wanna thrash him on the xbox again!

k dah. i wanna chat ah.
bye.

can i go berserk now? pls?

2005-04-08T01:05:00.000+08:00

the video project was great.
it went great. i was so happy.
but my fever was acting up.
so i managed to utter a few sentences before i slumped into silence.

it turned out dat khai isn't supposed to be my best fren.
kin is.
fir is kin's scandal and also khai's best fren.
and khai is kin's bf.
confused? don't be. dis is all fiction.
we are the cast of the No Direction's Nostalgia video clip.

ate a little although my stomach went kruk kruk.
until now.
and i can hear it eventhough my bro is playin his game
and i am typing oh so damn loud.
oh wat the hell.

and talking about the bro playing his game,
i had juz finished thrashing him a fighting game called "Death or Alive."
he lost 10-2 to me.
he was going, "eh! siak ah!", "kau. mampos!"
hahhahaa.. i'm good at fighting game ok.
too much practice at the arcade.

oh ya, about my title.
ya. can i pls go berserk now?
can? pls pls pls?
so dat i can juz pretend dat everything is stress-free.
i got a scolding from dad becoz i got home late tonite.
i was doing my project wat!
not dat i merayap!
ahh nvm. thank god mum sides wif me.
sumtyms i wonder if i anak mak or anak bapak.
coz i get along wif both sooooo well.
haizz..

i wish i could say alot more here
but i guess LJ is soo much more private.
so, anyone wif LJ account, if u haf my username, pls add me.
and if u're lucky, i might make an entry for friends only.
haha. nolah, almost all my entries at lj are for friends only.
private is a rarity.

i'm juz typing down my random thoughts.
don't mind me.
and thx alot for bearing wif me.

the end.

bleeding mascara.

2005-04-07T09:25:00.000+08:00

i'm so having an irritating and itchy sorethroat,
a now-filled-with-phlegm cough,
a wheezing cold
and to top it all off,
i can feel a fever building up.
how great.

am not going to skool today.
the kids and i are going to shoot our video project today.
like i've mention before, we'll be shooting No Direction's Nostalgia video.
and khai has to be my best fren.
so he has to act wif me - AGAIN.
i'm so gonna screw up acting wif him coz,
basically, he juz crack me up
wif his crazy antics and funny words.
haiz.

i'm so glad i haf sumthing to look forward to from now onwards.
no more crying, no more heartaches.
happiness is wat i'm truly yearning for.
hopefully i will get it in months to come.
i deserve some happiness. :D

oritey.
gotta get ready and mit the kids.

i'm sick!

2005-04-05T00:10:00.000+08:00

i'm having a dry cough and a sorethroat.
oh, how i hate dry cough!
it's making my throat so painful, so itchy and nasty!
too much of eating junks i guess!
but i tink i myself noe the reason y.

aniwae, my training will start on the 14th of dis mth.
so.. we haf all the tym in the world till den.
to do my projects.. to tink about other stuffs.. :)

skool starts at 12 tmr.
lucky.

and i'm updating for the sake of it.

:)

:)

2005-04-04T15:03:00.000+08:00

can someone pls stop me from smiling?
it's getting tiring and my jaw is cramped.
thanks eh.

dilemma.

2005-04-03T22:31:00.000+08:00

i'm juz so stucked i dono wat to do.
i tink i shd follow my head more than my heart.
juz for once.
but u noe sumthing?
i like dis dilemma.
haha. ;)

pls, does anyone tink about me before they say all dat?
pls gif me tym. pls pls pls gif me tym.
i won't predict the future.
u nv noe if we could jolly well ended up marrying each other.
but for now, i dun feel lyk doing all dat.
pls tink of me before u say and do all dat.

tmr, cls is cancelled.
so my group, which consist of my whole 8 mad cap frenz,
will be doing our video project.
yeap, another video project.
we'll be making No Direction's Nostalgia video clip.
coolness or wat??

i'm starting to..
ah.. nvm.. i rather keep it for myself.
lest i get disturbed if i disclose it.
haha.

lol.

2005-04-03T02:36:00.000+08:00

i had a great time.
and i can't belif i did manage to haf fun.
thank you very nice for everything...

and pls support No Direction guys..
i haf no freaking idea y i typed dis.

new pics are up.

and my com sux big tym.
someone kind enuf to buy one for me?

let's make it official.

2005-04-02T14:37:00.000+08:00

i won't say anything much.
but it's official.
i won't cry, i gotta be strong for everyone around me.
i hope n pray i won't crumble dat easily.

aniwae, got back home ard 4.30am today.
went to farid's house to continue wif our project.
and now, IT'S A WRAP!
hehe.
so fun.
khus, faliq, khai n me had the most scenes.
haiz. retarded idiots.
pics will be up soon.

going to my cuzzie bdae chalet later.
won't overnight though.
after dat, maybe a movie date wif my alif n khus.

orite.
life will be a-ok.
i noe it will.
i juz wished dat i'll stop feeling so empty.

for all the shits i've bin thru.

2005-04-01T01:09:00.000+08:00

i juz feel lyk screaming out loud.
do i haf dat "i haf thousands of problems" look written on my face?
y is everyone askin me dat?

my barista training starts next wk.
dat was what khai said anyway.
i nid to get a kick start on my life
so i guess it came at the rite tym.
coz i could finally vent my frustrations
and every single ounce of my energy in my training.
yeap.dat is wat i'm gonna do.

u noe the small girl ghost
dat kept sitting on my sis?
well, she's out of my house.
juz now my cuzzen's uztaz came by here
and he, erm, exorcise the ghost.
it was a lost child. poor thing.
i usually dun belif all dis things
but now dat it happened right in front of my eyes,
yeah, i believe it now.

i find it silly to laugh
if someone nudged me at MSN.
but i dono how to react if someone does dat.
i min, shd i nudged dat person back
or shd i say sumthing.
dat's y i juz laugh.
heh.

and seriously, i'm not ungrateful.
i juz feel dat i do deserve better.
not juz some shits dat i unwillingly accept.

haiz.

to khai, ur blardy pics are up! :D

i nid to bury myself alive literally!

2005-03-30T23:49:00.000+08:00

so tired.
so so damn tired.
of everything.

but on the other hand,
YOU better dun tell my secret.
aiyohh.. irritating bastard. :)

k lah. i'm tired of smiling.
n of everything.

New Chapter

2005-03-29T23:28:00.000+08:00

i've always tot of changing my url of my blog,
coz the kids had been disturbing me lyk,
"wat's the meaning behind liquidfied?",
"wat only, liquidfied."
"no meaning sia liquidfied."

okok, i get the point.
i didn't noe y i put liquidfied in the 1st place.
i didn't noe how managed to come up wif liquidfied in the 1st place.
oh well.

aniwae, dis new url has a meaning.
basically, my >()< <3 tinks dat it's about him.
he is in his emo, sensitive mood rite now
so practically he tinks dat every sarcasm, every tease is for him.
no dear.. i'll explain wat the faithful departed means to me.

it's about the past.
my past, our past.
the faithful departed past.
the past has departed.
now is a new chapter.
see.. dis is wat i reli min.
it wasn't a dig for u.
i didn't mean it to be a hit at u.
haiz.. nvm, i understand.
and i dun mind if none of u understand wat i min. :D

n yesh, the layout is still the same.
coz i juz love it and blogskins has very sucky skins at the mo.
so i'll stick to this skin for the tym being.
and anyway, dis skin is wat i'm feeling exactly at the moment.
so yeah..

juz now only alif, khus n me came to skool.
as in my group. the rest were blardy lazy. citot.
nvm, it was fun too.
but i'm sorie dat i was being moody, tired n sleepy.
added to khussy's crap, i juz couldn't bring myself to talk.

oriteZ lah. i'm sleepy.
skool's at 8am tmr. haizz.

so now, gd bye.